http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rCV-2LKYu5I
For two days it just poured it down, it was like i never left england at all
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7SmIBwrFqlk
Recently I’ve been spending my weekends with my grandma, learning how to cook her famous dishes. I always thought that there would be no way i could cook a proper pakistani dish like my gran can, but seeing her do it and taking part myself has shown me how easy it is. So far I’ve learned, Chicken buhna, Kofte and pilao rice, although my assumption is they’re not very healthy they taste amazing. It’s fun and it’s nice spending time with my gran, she doesn’t get too many visitors in the week so it’s nice to brighten up her day for a bit. I wonder what we’re gonna cook this week…
Alright I’m gonna write about another weekend. I think this is becoming a weekend blog. I can’t help it! Interesting things only happen to me on the weekend.
I spent some time with my Mamu Zafar again, it’s was great! I didn’t stay as long as I would have liked to but I had things to do. I hope I didn’t offend anyone. I had to go really because it was the final of strictly come dancing and that was where I watched it first and it only seemed fitting to watch the final there. It would have been weird if I didn’t. Oh and the final of X-factor too, those G4 boys completely ruined Creep by Radiohead… I think Radiohead should sue em… Scratch that they should blow they’re heads off!
I should mention I’ve been listening to Radio’s earlier stuff, it’s amazing! They’re truly one of Britain great bands and a tribute to… well everything music really! I was gonna say rock but they’ve branched out in to all sorts now. Still great though. I’d recommend them to anyone (if you like that kinda thing that is)
Awww it was a great weekend, I had a blast! My Mamu Zafar and his family are really sweet people. I’m so happy I’m getting to know them. They really have a special place in my heart. Everybody’s holidays are coming at the end of this week so might do something together if people aren’t busy. As to what it might be that I don’t know yet. Hope the cricket thing I was talking about earlier gets off the ground that’ll be fun.
Everything else is going well. I was asked to come down and see my friend’s brother who owns a computing consultancy company and he said I should come work for him. Am I moving down to London? I don’t know? I don’t really wanna but I think it’s because I’m afraid of change and London does scare me, I really don’t like big city’s and all the hustle and bustle. I mean I’ll get use to it but I hate the transition. But sometimes you have to do the things you don’t like to I guess. God knows I need the money.
I’m trying to get things together so I can go home to. I’m gonna try and do my passport today. But my motivation for going home as seriously gone down the tubes. My relationship with my parents has gone well really kinda sour. Long distant relationships are so hard. I guess if I was doing my own thing I wouldn’t get shouted at. But because I’m in a kinda limbo they’re not to happy about it. I think sometimes why do I let myself get hurt so much. And it’s not just once it’s over and over again. I give the person the benefit of the doubt (I’m not talking about my family now) that a person is good and trust worthy by nature but I keep getting duped by so many people. You learn quick don’t get me wrong but then it’ll be a differnt face with promises and they’ll dupe you too hehe, I can only laugh about it. That’s the way things go I guess.
Gosh I can smell fish food…. uuuuugh that wreaks! Damn this sensitive nose! There are three tubs of fish food right next to me besides my cousins fish tank and they wreak!
Ok that’s it for me I hope I’ll get to do everything I need to this week, that includes Sheffield and London, tall order for me I know, but my lazy ass has gotta do it :)
I had another great weekend with my family. It was khatam for my Grandad, kinda like an anniversary thing for the day he died. We read surah Yasin and had an Imaam (priest) come over who did a few prayers. Then we had food…
I know it was kinda somber occasion but I had a great time. The whole family was there bar a few people. We all sat around my Khala’s big dining table and had lunch. It was kinda like those picturesque moments you get in the American films on thanksgiving or Christmas when everybody sits around a large dining room table and pass food around and laugh and joke. That’s what it was like and it was really a good feeling. I don’t think I ever felt close like that with my family ever. My Khala was saying we should do this every month which i think is a great idea… but whether it happens or not is a different matter, I pray it does but I have this feeling it won’t. I hope I’m wrong. I guess I could always organize it… yeah come to think of it, if no one does I will! I think maybe some of my uncle’s and aunties might not like that but I’m growing older now and I’m wielding a bit of respect here and there :)
I can feel the tension I guess on both my mum and dad’s side between family members, and it sad really that they don’t spend time together more often. My Dad’s side is really messed up now, it was before but it’s now maybe I think getting better soon. My Mum’s side however is really different very warm and friendly and the Sunday with everybody really enhanced that and we should do that more often.
I really should’ve taken a picture when we were all around the table, I’m kicking my self about it now… Khala said one thing which really stuck in my mind, and it was a very appropriate thing to say too… She said while we were all sat at the table "Dad would be very proud of us", and she’s right.
Since I’ve started doing this family tree I’ve been closer to my grandpa and family then ever before. Oh I got loads of info from my Grandma. We talked loads, her english isn’t great and although my Urdu isn’t aswell we managed though. It’s funny actually she was too fast for me and I had trouble keeping up and getting names down. But I got a lot of info from her about her parents and their children. Although I think I’m gonna have to find another avenue (possible Pakistan) to find out about her grandparents, grandma said she was gonna make some calls and find out for me so we’ll see what comes from tha because we couldn’t get as fas as my great great grand parents. But it’s going well now and I’ve got enough info to start putting stuff down on paper and trying to figure it all out. Oh I got a new member of the team, one of my Mamu’s (uncle) he got some really cool info from like which caste we were from (arian) and tribes and things like that it was really interesting I’ll post it up soon. But yeah he’s on board and with help like that I think we might be able to do a really good job of this.
Yeah my brother didn’t come with me and everybody was asking where he is. Well I don’t know what’s up with him I think it’s probably a phase. But he should’ve really come this time, I mean it’s your Nanajaan’s Khatam man! Oh well… He’s eating the food a brought back I wasn’t gonna give him any because he didn’t go and I know he’d do that if it was me who didn’t go but I’m not like him. He gets me really mad sometimes on some of the things he does… I know brothers right… I think about things I can do to him when he hurts me, like well not being helpful or nice or do his dishes or give him food but I keep on reminding myself I’m not like that. Which is good cos then after a while I get over and don’t really remember what all the fuss was about.
I got a picture of my grandfather who died before I was born. I got it from my Uncle. When I first saw the photos it kinda took a hold of me and made me very emotional. I’ve seen a photo of grandpa before but I really didn’t remember it. Oh boy I won’t forget it now, after seeing them it’s etched in my mind . I got some cool info about where my family is from. I mentioned I’m doing a family tree for my mum’s side and we’ve definitely got a good start now :)
First of all apologies for the sudden direction this blog is taking into my family life. I never knew quite what I was going to do with this blog in the first place but my tech savvy cousin got me into it and I tried it out and liked it. Being so far away from my relatives for so long I never really got to know them. I guess they’re on my mind a lot these days and in my heart. I think I’m probably making up for lost time, gosh i love them all so dearly. I’m trying hard to break down barriers that I had and the distance I feel that I had created over the years. The good news it’s working. I don’t think I’ve ever been this happy in my life!
My brother… Where should I start.
I had a huge row with my brother when I came back from Bradford on the weekend. It’s quite funny actually now that I think about it but at the time I thought it was terrible. It all started off when I walked through the door. My brother was no where to be seen I guessed he was in the bathroom and I started to unpack all my gear and I was on the computer when my friend rang. While on the phone my brother makes his appearance and he didn’t give me Salaams, when I got off the phone he still didn’t give me Salaams but asked me a question… I was disappointed and asked him why he hadn’t greeted me while I’ve been away for so long…
It all started from there really and well there was no point to our argument except to really waste time. I still think there’s something wrong with him, he’s more distant than usual but I still can’t figure out what it is. But one thing I managed to do is, for him to come with me to Bradford… FINALLY! I know! But to tell you the truth it took a long time, this guy just isn’t a people person. Anyways it was I think the word cake and birthday (it’s his bday btw on Monday 29th Nov) that got him to go. That my Khala (aunt) is generously going to provide, she’s such a wonderful person. But seriously how could you say no when someone’s going to get you cake and you’re not gonna go. He thougt about it but he eventually gave in. I really don’t know what’s up with my brother these days. But don’t worry he’s finally coming now!
I swear we need to go home soon otherwise we’re going to kill each other :)
Attention: please do not perform the following unless you’re
in the right attitude (and I don’t mean mood swings I mean you’ve got be happy
with yourself and everybody constantly before you commit)… :)
Step 1…
Meet the family members you don’t know break the ice and get
to know them
After long last I finally went to my Mamu Zafar’s (mom’s
eldest brother) house. It’s the first time I’ve went with out my parents. I
know it was long overdue but I finally did it. Although unfortunately my
brother didn’t come due to various reasons (I can’t quite put my finger on).
But I really enjoyed myself and had a really great time. I wasn’t bored,
honest! I spoke to my cousins, although Baji Rozi and Baji Meena weren’t there
I still had a great time getting to know the rest of them. I didn’t realize how
fun Mamu Zafar is he’s like a big kid, it’s really quite scary because he
reminds me so much of myself which really freaks me out. Anyhoo although
nothing was planned we had a great time just talking I got to know Hashim
really well, he’s a great guy and Baji Furheen she’s really nice too, they’re
just such great people Allah has truly blessed them. Aunty Sakina makes amazing
food, it is to die for, hope I didn’t insult her because I’ve got a small
stomach and I didn’t really eat much, she made so much great food I should’ve
taken some back… Oh well I’m going again for seconds :) And I think we’ll plan
something for next time which is cool. I to tell you the truth I don’t think
I’ve ever hate that much since after Ramadan I don’t think I’m gonna be hungry
for days seriously… But no, really it was really nice of them.
I’m still kicking myself for not going on the Monday after
Eid cos Meena baji and baji Rozi waited for us too. That really dug the knife
in further, I should’ve been more aggressive and less passive on that day when
we left after Eid it’s just that everybody was leaving and I was kinda going
with the flow… what am I saying… I’ve already wrote about it, ah here it is…
(The next day Monday
we just chilled out and relaxed for the morning part. I was gonna phone my Mamu
Zafar to arrange when we could come over. As soon as I pressed the button on
the mobile to call them Mamu Asif (mom’s youngest brother) came up and said he
was leaving. I had to cancel the call and well everybody ended up leaving at
that time and we left around midday. I so wanted to go to Mamu Zafar’s and meet
everybody, and later I found out that our cousins stayed a bit longer just in
case anybody came. I felt so guilty after that, I was to complaisant on Monday
and just went with the flow. Oh well I’m gonna see them on the weekend so
that’ll be good)
I keep telling everybody I knew more about Rozi baji’s
husband Mohammed, the Italian stallion (it’s my nick name for him now hehe) but
yeah until I went to my Mamu Zafar’s on the weekend I really just knew the
Italian Stallion. But things are changing now which is really great for the
better.
There just such nice people it just sometimes is really
emotional you know. It upsets me to know that they’re so nice and that I didn’t
get to know them before and it upset’s me now because I’m so happy I know them
now and they’re just so damn nice!
To paraphrase mamu Asif when he was talking about family “it’s difficult
when people live far away from each other and lead such busy lives but
hopefully we can get closer and stay close” I feel it’s all about building
bridges now.
Well we watched Saturday night tv which I haven’t really
done in a while actually but it’s like we watched the programs I really didn’t watch or
never got into and we ended up watching them like Saturday Night: Strictly Come Dancing (and no I’m not gonig soft) to my surprise it was really good and it was well really entertaining, along with
the x factor and some others, I never got into reality shows like that before maybe it was
the company I was in, I dunno. But I wasn’t really bored. I spoke to Hashim
loads and he’s really great we spoke on a lot of things and I’m gonna take some
stuff back for him, he’s really into strategy games (like me), Homeworld and Homeworld 2
although they’re a bit old they’re classics. My Mamu’s family are really
into their films which is great. But apart from my Mamu, they haven’t really
seen the Peter Sellers stuff like the pink panther series and the party. I was
like you guys so have to see them they’re classics, when I watched them I don’t
think I’ve ever laughed so hard I started to cry. It’s great you find things
you have in common and you hit off.
I ended up ditching Nabeel and Umayr which I really didn’t
like but althought I was compelled to leave my heart told me to stay and keep
talking and learning and getting to know a family who are so close to me yet so
very far. But I feel I’ve come a long way with them now and this is just the first step…
Yeah so I didn’t get to watch the incredibles big deal… We
can plan it with Hashim and baji Furheen oh and Amir too.
of him he said he liked having cousins that was cute. He may look big man but
they’re all still so little inside. I am still like that sometimes I don’t think I’ll
ever grow up… Oh hang on Sponge Bob Square Pants is on :)
was great. I just thought I’d mention a few other things that I did. In case
you’re interested… I know you’re not but I’m gonna say it anyways :) Well all
the fun I had I ended up staying the night at mamu Zafar’s another first climb
of the hill of conquering mount familydom… Ok I’ll stop but yeah serisoiuly it
was good and I slept well they had a towel ready for me and everything it was
awesome like a hotel! :)
full in the morning ever. (Tip: if you’re hungry go to Aunty Sakina’s house go empty,
you’re belly will not leave empty… belly paradise!) But it’s all good. We did
some thing chalisma I think (end of the 40 days of mourning) for my Aunty’s Sister God rest her soul… May Allah (swt) give her
Jannah InshAllah. We read some Quran for her and had some grub. It was great I
got to help out too, it so definetly reminded me of my uni days when I was with the muslim
society feeding the masses in the prayer room. It went off without a hitch which
was great. It was just a real pleasure spending time with them whatever we did.
to Andy Timmons he’s amazing. Gosh you know everytime I see them it makes me
wanna take up the guitar or drums or something, it’s gonna start don’t worry
but it’s great to get that kinda of enthusiasm from them.
know… they’re family and I’m really happy, yup just happy, happy, happily
overwhelmed and so happy to get to know them. Although I don’t know all of them
it’s a start right?
Ok well it wasn’t long until I was back at my Khala’s house. I’m on baby sitting duty while my cousin’s dad and mom were out of town. His dad’s back now so everything’s cool. But we had the whole house to ourselves for a while. It was real erie when he was at school this huge house and nobody was in it. Anyways he was kinda of a handful for a while but kids are kids right, you just have to humour them. They have a pool table and he kept beating me the table’s rigged or something he’s just so damn fluky. I eventually beat him (best of 3) I don’t think he wants to play anymore now :)
Looking forward to tomorrow though we might go see the Incredibles… I’m psyched!
Well there’s no continuity in the muslim ummah these days so
technically it wasn’t really Eid day it was Eid days cos some people did it on
Saturday and some on Sunday, I don’t want to get in to an argument over this
but if you have any doubts it was on Saturday :)
It was really funny the night before I was trying to get the
right day phoneing around. On the Islam Channel on Sky they said it was on
Saturday and there was no Taraweeh in Saudi and I phoned my folks and it was
Eid on Saturday for them. I phoned my Taiji (Dad’s older brother) and he said
it was 99% on Sunday and my Khala (mom’s sister) said she’s doing it on Sunday.
I my Thaiji scratching his head and he was gonna phone around. I ended up
phoning a few mosques myself the leeds grand mosque said Sunday the Islamic
Welfare mosque in Sheffield (where I usually
go during uni) is on Saturday. I was really confused by now. It’s not
compulsory to do Eid prayer but it would be nice. I got back to my Taiji and
he’s doing it on Saturday so I thought cool I’ll do prayer with him. We had to
wake up some insane hour in the morning to make the 8:30 prayer but it was
worth it. Eid’s not the same without doing the prayer well for me it isn’t
anyways.
I had a great day we had great food from my Thaii (dad’s
brother’s wife) they put a lot of effort into it and it showed. Gosh it felt
really weird eating during the day after a month of fasting. I couldn’t get use
to it and I ate loads of food that day when my stomach said no more please I
just kept piling it in. Every house we went to we had to eat a bit. It’d be
rude not to.
Eid’s like Christmas for the Muslims so we see a lot of
family I was thankful to see a good portion from both sides as they’re both in Bradford. I saw my Taiji and his family. And always see
Uncle Abid at Eid prayer every year that’s the only time we meet. It’s really
funny actually but it’s always great seeing him it’s like it wouldn’t be Eid
without him really. Ok so I saw Uncle Yasin and Ali (the Iraqi) they’re great,
I love them to bits. We went to Ali’s house later and me Anty Anne and Uncle
Saleem who came from Malaysia and Aisha and her kids although one was feeling a bit porely but this is Adam
he’s so cute.
We met my cousin’s tenant a Lybian dude. He’s really nice
guy so full of life. It was great talking to him for the brief time we did. He
ended up calling me Osama. That was funny. This is one of his little guys he’s so cute
I ended up making a fool of myself, one of many throughout
Eid. We were at Ali’s house and we were having a discussion about me being
Jesus (the hair and the beard) and I can’t remember how I ended up talking
about Judas. But I was so tired (didn’t get any sleep the night before). I said
“who was that guy who betrayed Jesus”… That was stupid. I was gonna say Jacob
but I didn’t want to make a fool of myself. So when I didn’t say that I still
ended up embarrassing myself. By asking the question who betrayed Jesus? Oh I
guess that’s what comes with the hair and the beard.
Right we ended up going to my mamoo Farooq’s (mom’s brother)
a fashionably late, I think a bit too fashionable and a bit too late. So we
kinda missed all the food and stuff but we met everybody there and had a good
chat which was great. Aunty M’s (Mamoo Farooq’s Wife) spring rolls were to die
for, I haven’t had Chinese for a long time and those spring rolls taunted my
taste buds. Spring rolls aren’t traditional Eid food bye the way just in case
you thought they were, but really nobody cares… after a month of fasting food’s
food man whatever the shape for colour or texture.
Seeing Mamoo Asif and Aunty Jana again was great. I always looked up to my Mamu Asif
since I was a great talking to him and his wife Aunty Jana, and getting to know
them. Their kid whose name is also Adam is so cute. They grow fast don’t they…
I found that Aunty Jana’s
into Reiki too that’s so cool. It’s a shame some people are skeptical about it. But it’s great the way it’s spreading.
The Smart Casual Combination
Ok this turned a few heads for the right reasons or the
wrong ones I’m not too sure yet. I don’t know whether it’s my sense of style
that’s changing or it is it my new found attitude towards life that did it. I
didn’t think I could pull it off but I forgot about the negativities and just
thought it’d look good. I got criticized last Eid or I think the Eid before for
not dressing up and I guess to a certain degree I didn’t make the effort
because I really didn’t have anything thin but this time things were different.
In case you’re wondering what it was, it was a pair of really old vans shoes
(98 I think) pair of jeans, a long sleeve white top with the jacket from my
suite. I thought it looked good despite what anybody else thought. Normally I
wouldn’t of worn it but I left that all behind me it was great.
Along with my shabby hair and beard I was called all sorts
that day. It’s was really funny. On my dad’s side I was referred to as Jesus,
Badly Drawn Boy and Osama. My mom’s side it was Becks and a serial killer. It
was funny really when I was at my Mamoo Farooq’s when I’d just come in there
was my cousin and my Khala sniggering to themselves and I wasn’t really looking
towards them, but I heard when they said “should we tell him” and that’s when
they said I look like becks. Or at least that’s what I think they said, it was
all a bit overwhelming at the time. I’m not trying to “big up” myself here
that’s not the case I just thought I’d share what happened and how I felt
because it was funny at the time and made me feel good to.
The combination worked I guess. So I think I’ll use it more
often at high profiled events.
(I came across this picture while writing this entry in my blog. I was looking for a site for badly drawn boy and I came across this and I swear I did not see it before I went for Eid but it’ll give you some Idea of what I was wearing on the day and agian I must stress I thought of this before he did, it’s really quite funny when I found it)
Great seeing my cousins Nabeel and Umayr, could talk to those
guys for hours. We don’t see them all that much but when we do it’s great.
Nabeel’s a great guitar player he must practice loads, I’m very envious. Actually
he’s inspired me to do something about it now. I’ve always wanted to play the
guitar, and I’m not gonna try to hold it back any longer. I’d love to play the
drums and the bass to, but hold on hold on one thing at a time. I need to get
my foot in the door first, I need to find that door, don’t worry I’m looking
real hard. If we get good enough maybe we could start a band, that would be
awesome. I’m speculating here I can’t play a damn thing yet. If I’m still in
the same situation and I haven’t done anything about it you have my permission
to shoot me, or slap me silly, it’s your choice… My preference would be to hit
over the head with a guitar :)
We stayed at my Khala’s that night and got to celebrate Eid again
with them the next day. We went to my Nana’s (Grandfather mother’s side) grave the next day. I’d
never been before so I thought might as well go. It wasn’t eerie but wasn’t what
I expected or what I had in my mind. It was actually very pleasant and serial
really. I think my mom’s side have had a tough time without a Dad but mashAllah
they’ve turned out really well all of them and his grand kids, I’m sure he’s
very proud of us all.
My Mamoo Zafar came over (my mom’s eldest brother) with his
kids. I really don’t know them at all. I was really eager to talk to them but
they didn’t stay long. I found out more from the newest member of their family
Rozi’s (the eldest) husband. The Italian Stallion :)
We had a game of pool and man did he wipe the floor with me,
I found out he plays every weekend I had a few good shots but to tell you the
truth I didn’t stand a chance. Being from Italy we talked about Italian
billiards with the pins and the table’s much smaller. It was great but a shame
cos I got to know him more than I did his wife my cousin Rozi. In fact I know
more about him than I do any of mamoo Zafar’s family. Ok I know that’s sad. But
I’m making amends, better late the never huh. They said to come over on Monday
so I was gonna try while everybody was still around before they all go back to
there parts of the world.
We went to a restaurant later that night and we had good
food (shame mamoo Zafar didn’t come), we didn’t eat much but it was nice what I had and I don’t think I ever
felt that light coming out of an Indian restaurant. Usually I end up feeling as
big as the cow I’m eating but that wasn’t the case this time, it’s a good
feeling.
Oh damn! Another thing that happened which was really
embarrassing was I have pictures of friends and family on my phone. I took a
picture of my cousins at the restaurant and I was gonna show them how it turned
out. Being me I couldn’t show them the small version I wanted them to see the
big version on my phone. It ended up going to that album and they were like oh
who are they. Gosh that was really embarrassing, if I only scrolled down and
showed them the rest of the pics of my family and other friends. I didn’t know
how to handle it at the time. I just laugh now it was just so meant to happen
there was no way out of it… Thanx God
We went back to my Khala’s for dessert and well something
really quite silly, weird, or stupid. Oh my gosh I was embarrassed. I haven’t received
the pictures yet but it’s something that all the women made us do it was well
it was fun at the time, if I look back at it now what the hell was I thinking!
The pictures tell the whole story if I get them and post em up, you’ll
understand what I’m talking about, if not then you’ll never know muahahahahah!
A lot of things were mentioned. One which worried me the
most was the marriage aspect. Yep that’s right. It was from my Dad’s side
mainly (at Uncle Yasin’s house) they were joking about I know but never the
less the whispers have started I guess. Because I was talking to my Nani
(Grandmother) and she was telling me that she’s out there you don’t know her
name but she’s out there. It was really sweet of her what she said but it did
kind of send a few shivers or maybe they were shockwaves down my spine. Don’t get
me wrong I’d love to get married but it’s so not on my mind at the moment.
The next day Monday we just chilled out and relaxed for the
morning part. I was gonna phone my Mamoo Zafar to arrange when we could come
over. As soon as I pressed the button on the mobile to call them Mamoo Asif
(mom’s youngest brother) came up and said he was leaving. I had to cancel the
call and well everybody ended up leaving at that time and we left around midday.
I so wanted to go to Mamoo Zafar’s and meet everybody, and later I found out
that our cousins stayed a bit longer just in case anybody came. I felt so
guilty after that, I was to complaisant on Monday and just went with the flow.
Oh well I’m gonna see them on the weekend so that’ll be good.
So we got back on the train to go home and back to normal
life waiting for the next Eid
When I saw everybody there if was nice, it was so rare, I’d
love it if we could organize anther family photo like the one that’s on my
Nani’s wall. It’s a shame but I wish the family would get together more often.
Everybody’s growing up soo fast.
